Check your mindset twice as often as your phone.
The girl I used to be was never good for me, but she taught me and gave me vital lessons on how to become who I am now, and I am eternally grateful for those life lessons, as they gave me the opportunity to bloom into a better version of myself.
I used to be the girl who would post every little detail of her life on social media.
Updating my whereabouts, what I ate, luxury purchases… I would post to give people a clear insight into the life I have. I did this under the guise of expressing myself and sharing my experiences. I coveted likes and shares, and they meant so much to me that the number of likes an image receives starts to determine how valuable a person is. Somewhat seeking self-worth and outside validation. As time went by, the realization dawned on me that this only temporary fills a void, and it became clear that this was a completely unsatisfying and corrupted perspective of self-worth. The whole concept is completely absurd. However, in this new age of self-absorption, I became oblivious enough not to realise that I was, in fact, inflicting nazar (evil eye) on myself by my very own doings.
We don’t realise it, and we definitely don’t see it happening, but at some point, we get addicted to social media and feel obligated towards it. We see others posting smiling selfies, exotic places, and humble bragging about their professional or personal accomplishments. These’making’memories’ moments soon start to become a ‘look at me’ competition, and we end up despondent, thinking our own lives doesn’t measure up.
The amount of likes, shares, and comments gets embedded into our minds and makes us think that we need to update people; we need to prove something to people about ourselves to feel better and perhaps increase our self-esteem.
While FOMO has been around far longer than social media, sites such as Facebook, Instagram, etc. seem to exacerbate feelings that others are having more fun or living better lives than you are. The idea that you’re missing out on certain things starts to impact your self-esteem, trigger anxiety, and fuel even greater social media use, much like an addiction.
Social media also speaks volumes about our yearning for genuine human connection and authenticity.
Because of the facade of keeping up with trends and expectations, we gradually lose ourselves in the process and lose focus on our faith and the most important things in life.
We get so addicted to the game of posting on social media that it often doesn’t occur to us, and we don’t realise the number of evil eyes preying on us. It could be our own family or close friends, and it is not only confined to strangers. Then, without warning, life suddenly starts spiraling downhill, and we can’t begin to fathom why this keeps occurring in our lives, yet the person to blame is ourselves!
This is my reason for becoming more cautious, selective, and reserved with social media.
It has been the best feeling ever. It’s like I put myself under strict probation, and the rewards are tremendous.
When your opinion of yourself becomes the most important, the need for outside validation stops dead in it’s tracks.
Have you ever really thought about the people that you assume are your good friends or family? Do they really have your back, or are they the ones who are only interested in entertaining themselves with your life updates? When you became silent. They also became silent… Waiting for the moment you post so that they can pounce on you with questions… and then they gleefully hold the ‘title deed’ for the latest hot gossip.
I want you to know that there is no need to chase this dillusional idea of becoming something you’re not. There’s no benefit in wanting a life filled with expectations from people at the expense of losing yourself mentally, physically, and spiritually. You are unique in every way, and there’s absolutely no need to prove anything to anyone except your Creator!
To the people who envy me, Who have bad intentions for me,
Who sit behind a screen and criticise…
Take heed, because this is for you.
O’ my enemy, you may have achieved your aim in destroying me, but you have failed to realize that my faith (imaan) is stronger and continues to grow; my Allah is by my side, and He is aware of everything at any given moment.
O’ my enemy, you thought you could break me, but Allah Ta’alah has granted me the understanding that every good and bad that occurs in life has divine wisdom behind it. It may seem that your machinations worked, but they have only drawn me closer to Allah and made me more conscious of Him.
The one who stays aloof from the righteous has, in fact, become aloof from Allah Ta’alah.
No matter what negativity a person may be experiencing in life, there will always be a solution and a way out. We have a choice between the negative and the positive. There are no dead ends.
Therefore, it is vital for us to remain steadfast in our deen and to have friends who are Allah-conscious, because if a person is true to Allah, they will be true to you. These invaluable gifts help to easily erase toxicity in a person’s life and apply wisdom and positivity to their lives, which in turn makes it easy to move forward.
It helps the individual let go of people who poison their spirits and bring needless drama into their lives.
We have to become people who are big enough to admit our mistakes, smart enough to learn from them, and strong enough to correct them!
I make dua that Allah grace us all with goodness, clarity, and sincerity in every facet of our lives.
Please remember this sinful servant in your esteemed duas.
